Saturday, May 12, 2012

Life in Progress

What a simple statement!  My mom basically gave me this advice over and over while I was growing up.  Believe me, I have failed miserably at achieving such a simple thing.  I've made plenty of boneheaded decisions that may have hurt others.  Over the course of my 52 years I have gossiped, manipulated, lied, stolen things that were not mine.  I've cheated, skipped school, called in sick when maybe I really didn't feel that bad.  I have talked bad about others. I stole my friends boyfriend.   I have been intentionally mean to people.   I have been disrespectful to others.  Every night when I lay my head on the pillow, my prayer is that I will try harder to be that person in the quote tomorrow...and I do try.  Every day I try. 

I know that perfection is out of my reach. I know that every day I will be tested and more likely than not, I will stumble.  I think it is the trying part that is so important.  If I stop trying to be the person in the quote, I am terrified of what I will become.  I don't want to be the mean, bitter old lady who never comes out of her house.  Seriously.  As I get older, tolerance is so much harder for me.  Isn't that the opposite of how it is supposed to be?  I thought that patience came with age.  Honestly, I am more patient than I was in my younger years, but I am certainly not more tolerant. 

One thing that age has given me is the wisdom to know that it is okay not to like everyone I meet.  That certainly doesn't give me permission to be unkind to anyone, but does free me from the guilt of feeling like a bad person because I don't care for someone.  We are going to come across plenty of people in our lives that we don't warm up to and that is okay.

I guess the point of this babble is to say that I am still trying to be the best person I can be.  I know everyday is an opportunity to do better.  I can be a better friend, a better neighbor a better citizen.  I hope I never stop trying to be the person in the quote.  I'm certainly not there, but I'm trying.  This is after all, my life in progress.

No comments:

Post a Comment